Tuesday, June 1, 2010


More on enjoying my children:

I have been reading this blog for a couple of years. Elizabeth is a Catholic homeschooling mom of 9 children, a writer, and she is one of my inspirations to be a better mother. Recently she has been sharing some columns she wrote that date back 10+ years, back to when she was a young wife and mother. Today she posted a column she wrote in 1996, when she had just 3 children, had just moved into a new home, and had so many things to cross off her to-do list. She asked her sister-in-law for advice regarding her clingy toddler and this is what she told Elizabeth:

"Embrace him. He is empty and unsure of your permanence, for whatever reason, and the more you resist, the more unsure he gets. The more unsure he gets, the more he will cling. Embrace him every time he wants you to, for as long as he wants you to. Don't let go until he does. Eventually he will."

Oh my how this advice spoke to me today. I've been contemplating my weekend these past couple of days, what we did, etc., which is mainly what we didn't do. I will complain to Jeff that "all I did today was hold and nurse a baby, clean up messes, make meals, tame fighting siblings, and so on." I always think I feel so much better about myself if I accomplished something really big--cleaning the house or planting flowers or taking a day trip or simply crossing things off my list--some big obstacle I could tackle--not nursing and nursing a baby and toddler or doing the other countless mundane tasks. Michaela is almost 8 months old--a happy and fun baby stage, but also so demanding and tiring. Separation anxiety, so developmentally normal, seems to be peaking for her, and it makes me so very frustrated at times when I crave solitude.


I AM accomplishing something really big--I am caring for my children, my three precious gifts from God, our beautiful healthy girls. I am loving and holding and hugging and nursing that precious soon-to-crawl baby girl who thinks I am the best thing in her world. She whimpers when I am out of her sight for even a second now, but in time that's not how it will be. This is her time. I need to embrace my little girl and give her what she needs--I will have so much time in the upcoming years to cross things off my to-do list, and I'm sure at that point I'll long to cuddle a baby in my arms and walk the house performing my daily duties with her on my hip or in the sling. And as such, she beckons with her cry from our bed. And so I go to her to give her the love and comfort she needs--and probably some mama milk too :)


  1. I don't really have any better advice than what you seem to have gleaned from what sounds to be an incredible blog. Again, Marla you are a WONDERFUL Wife & Mother, Daughter & Friend!
    Your 'other Mom',

  2. That's beautiful! Thanks for sharing it because its relevant to me too.

  3. I know I don't have my sweet little girl yet but I know I'll feel like you some days too. What excellent advice, and wouldn't you know it...reading that made me tear up! Don't you LOVE pregnancy hormones?! :-)